"Okay class I've given you all a sheet of paper," I told my elementary school kids. They never have their own paper and they're not expected to.

"I'd like you to take out a pen and write on that sheet: One word in English."

Most kids wrote vocabulary words from my previous lessons. Things like colors and numbers. Below are the more interesting answers.

ADDIDAS
Stitch
Potato
Sugar
Mentos
I love you
Puma
Pizza-La (my favorite)
Disney
Capcom
Boss (a drink company ala Snapple or Pepsi)

I found this pamphlet while in a shoe store. No idea what the intent is, but reads like "Barf Out" to me.

Okay, yeah the "Homme" might be a clue that this is really French or something. But still...

Yukiko Kimijima
HOMME
BARFOUT!

The following is an actual assignment I graded. The identity of the writer has been removed to protect the innocent.

At first I had trouble understanding what this was all about. Was it some sort of joke? Turns out "The Cocksucker" is really some Rolling Stones song.

Truly I tell you, the world is a strange place.

I'm going to talk about Natumi You.
She is a menber of Takaraduka.
My mother told me about her last year.
Natumi joined Takaraduka as a male impersonator in 1976.
She became a leader because she very good at acting.
After a while, the in vitation whather you were going to do the cocksucker in her came.
It's very difficult that male inpersonatar's person performs the cocksucker.
But, she didn't decline it.
She kept practicing everyday, and performing the cocksucker splendidly.
I learned a lot of things from her.
I think that It's inportant to challenge a difficult thing.
I want to go to see Takarazuka that shi is performing Some day.
Thank you.